Sunday 21 December 2014

Christmas Spirit: The Non-Boozy Kind

It's been a long time since I've sat down to write a blog post so you'll have to excuse the rustiness and verbal diarrhoea which may shortly ensue.

Christmas is just four days away. With all the festive frolics, steaming mulled wine and crooning carollers, it's easy to see why Christmas is considered the most magical time of the year. This year, though, everything has changed. Instead of throwing myself into Christmas preparations with a glorious joyeux de vivre, I find myself longing for the coming New Year and the beginning of 2015.

Maybe it's the endless consumerism, the barrage of stressed shoppers scrambling around for the best Christmas deals, the growing anxiousness to get the "perfect present", or maybe it's because this time of year is a constant reminder of things lost...but I’m finding Christmas less and less enjoyable this year.

In all the bustle of Christmas, it's often easy to forget that Christmas can be the loneliest times of the year for some people. Watching other people excitedly getting ready for a Christmas packed with family and friends must bring a sharp pang to the heart of anyone who has recently experienced a loss of some kind.

People can be snapped away in an instant. So, if I could impart one message about Christmas—if I've learnt anything from this year at all—it's not to take the people around you for granted. They can be gone in a heartbeat, leaving you filled with so many regrets. Christmas is a stressful time but don't lose sight of the fact that you probably have a lot of people out there who really care about you. If you love someone, hold onto that love and don't let it slip away.

As someone spending Christmas single this year, it is hard to believe that this time last year I was giggling in the arms of someone who I thought was the most special guy in the world: The guy I thought I would be spending every day with for the rest of my life. Twelve months later and that dream is hopelessly lost—and no amount of work on my part can fix it, nor any prayer change it. I've lost my dream…but it's made me more determined than ever that everyone else gets their happy ending. Make your wishes come true. Keep hold of the magic of love this Christmas and enjoy every moment you spend together—because it can all end with just a few heated comments. Don't let rash words or the strain to create "a perfect Christmas" bring with it an avalanche of regrets. If you love someone, keep them. Love isn't about never having cross words or always agreeing with each other—but it is about being prepared to compromise and loving each other enough to try again. Love is not about walking away forever because you're scared something may not fit further down the line; it's about trying to make things work regardless.

I know of so many couples who are struggling because of the strain which Christmas brings and it simply isn't worth it. Christmas only lasts a few days—so, please, if I could ask one thing of anyone reading this, it's this: Don’t do anything you might regret further down the line. Do not split with a partner unless you've truly stopped caring for each other. Who cares if he forgot to buy the cranberry sauce? No one likes it all that much anyway. What does it matter if she's invited that aunt who you've never liked to stay for a few days over the Christmas period? It's only two or three days and then you have the place to yourself again.

Keep the people that you love around you for Christmas and enjoy every moment. Pull crackers, groan at the silly jokes, get merry on tipples of wine, stuff yourself full of roast dinners and Christmas pudding, live in the moment… and have a wonderful Christmas.

The spirit of Christmas is the spirit of love and of generosity and of goodness. It illuminates the picture window of the soul, and we look out upon the world's busy life and become more interested in people than in things.” —Thomas S. Monson.

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