The End of Summer

I must apologise to you guys for the delay in updating. There's just been so much going on recently that I've been a little overwhelmed, to be perfectly honest! Unfortunately, this summer—alongside gifting the UK with an abnormally rainy August—has dealt a fair whack of bad news to the household. I've handled the problems but there were a few hairy moments along the way—and I was definitely forced to follow the advice I gave out in these blogs!

The good news is that I should have some fun and interesting blogs coming up! I've got lots of exciting trips planned and I'll update you on those over the next few months, as I embark on a variety of interesting new adventures!

I'm also going to continue posting more self-help articles. I always feel like I'm preaching a little bit with those—but I only post things which have positively helped me or friends. I know there’s always going to be things on my blog that people don’t agree with, for whatever reason, because everyone has their own beliefs and thoughts, but hopefully there will be some helpful tips here.

I see life as an empty book where we can write our beliefs and make our own choices—and sometimes we might find a spark of an idea which resonates so strongly within us that we are compelled to ‘magpie’ it, as we create our own life story. There’s so much potential in all of us and each fresh chapter brings with it exciting new experiences for us to try. It is never too late to scribble out old ideas and start again on a fresh blank page.

Since being diagnosed with coeliac disease, I have been on a mission to find delicious gluten-free food and will be adding a few gluten-free recipes to the blog, too. Truthfully, the first few months felt like a prison sentence had been issued (and anyone who says gluten-free bread tastes nice is definitely lying) but things do get easier as your body adjusts to the different tastes.

Note: If anyone has recently been diagnosed and would like extra support, I'm happy to post up advice and helpful tips. Whether you have coeliac disease or gluten intolerance, you don't have to suffer alone!

I've also been dipping into the gaming world again recently. My days of playing Dota 2 on Steam are few and far between now but I've loved indulging in spending more time on the X-Box 360, especially on RPG games (Mass Effect is my newest love since finishing Dragon Age). I can’t pretend to be amazing at any of the games but I definitely enjoy them.

For a while, I've been toying over whether or not to upload some poetry that I've been working on—but I might leave that for now. I've spent the last few months, in between working lots, editing a novel. I’ll probably never submit it to a publishing house (I'm shy when it comes to sharing prose or poetry work—and struggle even with close friends) but I'm proud of myself for sticking with this story. The demon writer’s block has caused so many face-palming moments that I never dreamed I'd get this far. On the bright side, I can tick this off the bucket list for 2015 now!

Anyway, I hope you're having a wonderful Sunday! I'm off to sit by the bay and watch the last rays of summer glisten over the sloshing salty sea waves. Have a lovely weekend!

If you'd like to, feel free to follow me on Twitter (@Alexagirl07).

F. x

Picking up the Pen: A Little Slice of Honesty

Sometimes I look around at the world and I wonder if everyone would find life much simpler if they just said exactly how they felt or spoke out honestly. Would more arguments be avoided or would more be created? I can't help but think that the world would be a better place if people just spoke their mind—because most of the time it is possible to speak honestly whilst still being kind.

Maybe if we were truthful always then there would be less of a need to involve third parties, too, because we would have said our piece straight away and could then move on. For the last few weeks, I've tried on repeated occasions to be honest about feelings but I've repeatedly made the rookie mistake of trying to designate a convenient time to do it. Essentially, I think I've been too well-mannered and timid about saying anything straight up, just in case I accidentally offend. After all, no matter how well-meaning you are, there is—of course—always the chance that the person you're speaking to is not going to respond positively to what is being said.

My main concern is always that I don’t want to hurt someone or cause them discomfort. Lately, I've been beating myself up over past situations where I've meant well—and had good intentions—but have unwittingly caused other people pain. Ironically, perhaps, from being too honest about things which would have better been left unsaid.

As a general rule of thumb, if something is troubling you personally then it's best to get it off your chest. If you sit and wallow on the thoughts then the feelings just grow and cause you more trouble. Everyone is different but I think a straight up approach saves pain and reduces the chance of things becoming rocky at a later date. Over the last week, I have been realising increasingly that every moment is precious―and I'd much rather spend my time being open, living in the moment, rather than wallowing or brooding over issues. I can't say that this is the best approach to life for everyone but it's certainly one that seems to work best for me.

Stay true to yourself and stand up for what you believe to be right in your heart. If you're doing that, you can always hold your head up high―whatever the outcome.

 
“If the person you are talking to doesn't appear to be listening, be patient. It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear.”
― A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh

F x

An Overdue Update: How Do You Achieve What You Want In Life?

It's been a long time since I've written and I'm going to keep this relatively short. A lot has been going on in my life recently and I've been working very hard on my fiction writing! The novel I've been writing is nearing completion and I'm feeling more than a little excited about the fact that my characters are coming alive on the page—and are finally getting their stories told. Sometimes it's really nice to escape into that fantasy world and delve into scenarios that you almost wish you could see happen in real life.

The fact that I'm almost finished with this novel has led me to re-evaluate the things I would like to receive in life, though. For the most part, I can honestly say that I've achieved a lot of dreams which I wished for—and life is falling into place pretty perfectly. There's still a couple of aspects which I'd like to achieve and a few projects which I'd like to complete though—and it's made me think a lot about people's success stories.

I'm a curious cat and I'd like to know what you do to achieve the things you want in life? How do you go about reaching your goals? What kind of mindset do you have? I've found recently that the things I want often seem to come to me when I've let go of the situation completely and have stopped despairing over how everything can be achieved. Is positivity the key to your success or do you set yourself small tasks and work your way up to receiving your big goal? What is the secret to any dreams you've achieved over the last few years? You don't have to share your success stories with me but take a moment to consider them. Perhaps there's a pattern which might be the key towards unlocking your future desires.

Whatever you do, have faith and stay positive. You can achieve everything and anything in the world if you put your mind to it—and I have absolute faith that one day your dreams will manifest in a way which is even more wonderful than you first imagined.

“Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, the mind can achieve.”
~Napoleon Hill

Have a wonderful day. x

Turning the Tables: A Stage Review

Last Saturday, I had the pleasure of attending Origins Theatre Company’s production of Turning The Tables. In a one night only sell-out show, six fifteen-minute plays were performed to an eager audience inside The Sail Loft of the Bargeman’s Rest pub in Newport.

The plays performed showcased the top six winning and highly commended entries of Origins Theatre Company’s “From Page to Stage” play-writing competition—and the quality of writing was clearly very high.

The audience were treated to a unique format and setting, which saw the action taking place down a central aisle in a ‘traverse theatre’ layout.

The audience were also joined by several of the writers behind the mastermind plays, who watched their work come alive onstage for the very first time.

Deliciously dark and devilishly funny, Turning The Tables contained all the traditional elements of a black comedy play—but with a plethora of brilliant plot twists and turns added along the way.

Paul Gwinnett and Robbie Gwinnett offered up a great performance as father and son in the first play, Gunpoint. The play began with a dishevelled Roy (played by Paul Gwinnett) pelting down the aisle to escape his gun-wielding son (Robbie Gwinnett), who decided that his father should pay the ultimate price for walking out on the family.  In a hilarious twist, the father decided to ask for a do-over of his death scene so that he could avoid dying to clichéd phrases.

The second play of the evening, Sway, opened with Milo (Reuben Loake) attempting to hang himself whilst on-off girlfriend, Greta (played by Eleanor Jane Spicer), antagonised and mocked him.  Whilst Kitty (Emilly Scott-Denness) stormed onto stage, begging the duo to stop their games, Greta’s taunts took a darker turn as she tried to convince Milo to commit suicide and become a “legend”. 

Eleanor Jane Spicer shone out, providing a fantastic portrayal of the bitter and goading Greta. Reuben, as Milo, was equally excellent when he snapped and “turned the tables” on Greta in a deadly finale. The play was gripping from start-to-finish, with a rollercoaster of emotions impressively displayed by all three actors.

A personal highlight was the third play, Home Truths, which focused upon a nervous son (Robbie Gwinnett) attempting to “come out” to his parents.  Maureen Sullivan was excellent as the gossipy and loquacious Moira, who repeatedly foiled her son’s attempts to share his news.  In an amusing final scene, when the truth was finally revealed, the father (Paul Gwinnett) divulged that he had a few skeletons—or dresses—of his own in his closet.

Kevin Wilson and Amelia Havard were brilliant in A Valued Employee as the battle between employer and former employee began. Kevin Wilson presented a calm and stoical Mr. Trace, which was perfectly offset against the emotional whirlwind that was the unhinged Natalie (Amelia Havard). Alongside dramatic arguments and failed seductions, the audience enjoyed some light-hearted comedy as it was revealed that the Natalie’s prescribed medication was, in fact, a packet of Tic Tacs.

In Venus Retrograde, a love affair between two work colleagues turned sour as true colours and feelings were exposed. Fiona Gwinnett and Suzi Chilton, as Helen and Becky, gave convincing performances whilst discussing Jake’s (played by Reuben Loake) betrayal and seduction of the new girl at work. Likewise, the tension and sniping between smooth-talking Jake and cruelly spurned Helen (Fiona Gwinnett) was fantastic.  As the play progressed, it soon became clear that revenge was a dish best served cold—in the form of a dodgy prawn sandwich.

The final play for the evening, Brushstrokes, was a delicious blend of drama, deception and manipulation—with the perfect sprinkling of comedy added for good measure.  As the play opened, three art models (played by Robbie Gwinnett, Marie Hickman and Michael Mullin) delivered a series of passionate monologues which revealed how the painter, Benedict St. John, had manipulated pivotal moments in their lives. Referring to one another initially by the title of their paintings, the “Girl Sipping Tea”, “Boy Juggling Oranges” and “Boy in Trunks” each took turns describing their relationship with Benedict and the subsequent events leading up to his death. 

In particular, Marie Hickman stood out as the stunning model, Isabel (“Girl Sipping Tea”), who fell for the Lothario painter and grieved over his death. Funny moments included manly poses from Michael Mullin and some skilled orange juggling from Robbie Gwinnett.

All six plays, which were expertly directed by Eltjo De Vries for Origins Theatre Company, were greeted with a warm reception by the audience.  

If you’d like to be kept up-to-date with Origins Theatre Company’s latest plays and projects, head over to their Facebook page now.

Funny and Happy Quotes to Raise a Smile

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them, and you have their shoes.
―Frieda Norris


 The conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
―Arthur Bloc


 Why do people say "no offense" when they're about to offend someone?
―Author Unknown

I laugh at myself. I don't take myself completely seriously. I think that's another quality that people have to hold on to... you have to laugh, especially at yourself.
 ―Madonna


The best way to treat obstacles is to use them as stepping-stones. Laugh at them, tread on them, and let them lead you to something better.
―Enid Blyton, Mr Galliano's Circus 

Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion. I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward.
―Kurt Vonnegut

Forgiveness is a funny thing. It warms the heart and cools the sting.
―William Arthur Ward

Age is just a number. It's totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine.
―Joan Collins

How to Become Emotionally Independent in a Relationship - Part 2

Last time, I started to explain how to become emotionally independent in a relationship. I really want to help anyone struggling with this so today we're going to go through a few simple exercises that will help keep you grounded in the present time. By living in the moment, you should feel more relaxed and less worried about what might happen in the future with your boyfriend or girlfriend. Your thoughts will be absorbed in what is happening in the present moment, rather than on concerns about what might happen in the future.

So, how do you live in the "now" and stop worrying about the future?

I've outlined a few techniques and exercises below which I hope will help teach you mindfulness and distract you from worrying about what's going on in your relationship.

1) Connecting with the people and objects around you:

If the weather is fine, take a few minutes out of your day to go for a walk outside. Focus on what's around you, paying attention to any road signs you see and making an effort to notice the tiny details e.g. the different types of flowers in a hanging basket, the windows above a tatty shop building, the golden name plate on a park bench etc. By doing this, your thoughts should quieten and you should find it easier to enjoy living in the moment.

Whenever you feel that your thoughts are becoming chaotic with worries and concerns about your relationship, place your hands down on your thighs and focus on the weight of them. Notice how each finger feels against the fabric of your clothing and keep focusing on that until the thoughts quieten.

To help you further, have a quick look at the people around you when you're outside. Remind yourself that—just like you—those people have laughed, cried, smiled and known a lot of the emotions that you're experiencing. This will help connect you more with the people around you and take your mind off of your current worries.

2) Breathing techniques:

Meditation and breathing techniques are really helpful for easing worries. Whenever you start to panic or feel insecure, calm yourself with relaxing meditational music and good breathing techniques. 

Breathing Technique: Hold your breath for the count of four seconds, inhale through the nose for seven seconds, and then exhale through the mouth for eight seconds. Repeat until you feel calmer.

3) Resist the urge to check in on your partner all of the time:

I know it's hard when you care about someone and are itching to hear from them...but try to stop yourself from texting your partner all the time for reassurance. Even more than that, if you do send a text, do not follow that up with another text if they fail to respond. Give them some space and do not chase. It can be quite emotionally draining to receive text messages from partners who are constantly seeking reassurance so try not to fall into that trap.

If you think that you might struggle with this then have a "go to" group of friends who you text whenever you feel yourself itching to message your significant other. Your partner is much more likely to respond if you don't chasing him/her for an answer.  

4) Believing in yourself

It's really important that you try to build up your own self-esteem. You have to believe that you are worthy of your partner. The fact is that he or she chose you for a variety of reasons. You have to trust them and have faith in your own self-worth. If you trust their decision and value yourself then everything else will fade away.

5) Make time to do something you love or develop a new hobby:

A little space in a relationship is healthy. You and your partner both need a few hours where you can do something separate from each other—something you both love. It also means that you both have more  things to talk about when you come back together. If there was a hobby that you enjoyed doing before you got with your partner then I suggest taking that up again.

Above all else, remember that your partner is in love with you. Love isn’t about needing proof or evidence—often it’s about having the faith and courage to believe that your partner truly loves you. Trust that your significant other wants you.